which pain?
- I'm afraid I'm losing the felt presence I once had
- I'm afraid my faith is thinning and might soon be gone
- I'm afraid the discipline I had is slipping away from me
- I'm afraid the soft parts of me I worked years to recover are being hardened again
- I'm afraid I'm becoming the kind of man I promised myself I'd never be
- I'm afraid the version of me that could feel things openly is slipping back behind a wall
- I'm afraid I'm watching her pull away and I don't know how to call her back
- I'm afraid the marriage we used to have is dying while we both keep walking past it
- I'm afraid I'll outlive her and not know how to be a man without her in the house
- I'm afraid something is going to happen to my child and I won't be able to stop it
- I'm afraid the closeness I had with my kid is slipping as they grow
- I'm afraid I'm losing my child to a world I cannot follow them into
- I'm afraid I'll never feel the presence I keep hearing others describe
- I'm afraid I'll never find a faith I can truly call mine
- I'm afraid I'll never know what others mean by being held by God
- I'm afraid I'll never get past the voice in my head that sounds like every man who failed me
- I'm afraid I'll never feel at home inside my own skin
- I'm afraid the man underneath all the survival is someone I'll never get to meet
- I'm afraid she'll never see the man I keep hidden from her
- I'm afraid we'll never get back the closeness I keep hearing other couples talk about
- I'm afraid I'll never become the husband she actually deserves
- I'm afraid I'll never be the father they actually needed me to be
- I'm afraid I'll never break the cycle my father started
- I'm afraid my kids will never know the parts of me I keep hidden
- I let the felt presence slip away years ago and I cannot find my way back
- I regret abandoning the practice that used to steady me
- I regret walking away from the faith I was given
- I regret the years I spent armoring up to be acceptable to rooms that were never going to accept me
- I regret all the times I stayed strong when I needed to be held
- I regret losing the gentle one I was as a boy
- I regret the years I spent at work when I should have been home with her
- I regret the way I spoke to her in the years I should have known better
- I regret not seeing her the way she needed to be seen while I had the chance
- I regret the years I missed of my kids' childhood that I cannot get back
- I regret the things I said to my child in anger that he still remembers
- I regret teaching my son to keep his feelings inside before I learned not to
- I never sought the presence and now I'm not sure I can begin
- I regret never building a daily practice when I had the years
- I regret never asking whether God was real for me
- I regret never letting myself learn what I actually wanted under all the things I was told to want
- I regret never building a relationship with the man inside the armor
- I regret all the years I spent performing the man and never being him
- I regret never learning to be soft with her
- I regret never asking her what she actually wanted from me
- I regret never letting her see all the way inside
- I regret never saying I love you to my son the way my father never said it to me
- I regret never having the conversations with my child I needed to have
- I regret never apologizing to my child when I should have